Compassion

I've realized I don't have as much free time on my hands like I used to but now that I look back on my posts, I rant a lot, and I apologize for stressing such small and insignificant issues that really do not compare to major circumstances. I truly am a teenager.
Looking around me, I find myself surrounded by such a variety of individuals that are either a good influence or a bad one. My goal as a teacher for confirmation students is to be able to get through to them and have them trust me the way I trust them. I can only hope they do not repeat my personal stories but if that's the choice they make, then maybe they're not the kind of person I thought they'd be.
Tonight I shared one of my most personally stories, the one that makes me cry remembering the emotions I went through, I have a feeling that I got through to some of them, that they really were listening to me. It's a strategy I tend to use to make them believe me when I say, "I get really personal and I just hope you don't tell anyone. I am trusting you." It hurts to bring up the past, but sometimes the past is where you see how much you've grown and how much you can still change.
There is no perfect person in this world, but that does not mean you need to abandon all hope; change and you will see the difference. I am immature, crazy, and sometimes, no, I usually overreact for nothing in particular. There are times where I do not understand how my family or my boyfriend put up with me, I go berserk and scream and yell and cry and through tremendous fits even at the age I am. I tend to think maybe I grew up too fast and now my childhood caught up to me, or maybe, I'm just insane and have no idea what I'm doing, but I do want people to see I have a lot of faces, and I know there are a lot of people who go through the same, but I don't know which face I really am.
I've lost myself through the transitions and cannot remember who I was as a child or who I want to be, my mind gets filled with doubts and rumors and believe what anyone tells me. "You're bipolar!" Maybe I am. "You're 'emo.'" At some point. "You're a liar." Only when it's necessary. "You fight too much." Yes, I do. Honestly, I will agree with almost anything anyone ever tells me, but the one thing I know for sure is when someone tries to put me down that only means they've done something wrong if not worse than what I have. Everyone has their stories, who am I to judge? I am an open-minded person and I pray to God that I can reach people and make them see the brighter side. Hopefully I find out who I am during the process. It's time to find a way to help each.
Recently during my English class there was a debate on how society treats each other. "There are less compassionate people in this world." There are only a few stories you hear, here and there, that are about people doing a good deed for someone else, but, to be honest, they're becoming pretty rare. Everyone is starting to think that anyone who begs will only use money for drugs or alcohol, who are we to know if they truly are struggling. Personally, I don't care what they do with the money, whatever money I give is usually money that would have been squandered on useless things, maybe they will get drugs but at least my conscience is clean and I feel better that I did something that could potentially help someone in their time of need.
I'd like to see more kindness in the world and less judgment. Here's my challenge to you: Don't think. By that I mean, try to be selfless and not worry if someone else is going to appreciate what you've done or not. You've done what you can and that's all that matters. Do a good deed and don't repent or beat yourself up about, you've made a difference in the world, that's all that matters.