I'd like to think I'm a good girlfriend. I sacrifice my time, my friends, my hobbies, all just to tend to my boyfriend. Whenever I'm not distracted, I'm usually thinking about him. I dream about what we could do together, and yet, none of it ever happens. We're just so different.
"Opposites attract." Yes they do, but they don't coexist with one another. The don't fit together, in fact, their attracted but pushed apart at the same time. I use to think my boyfriend and I had so much in common. I couldn't be more wrong. Yes, we liked the general things, but when it fell into the details we weren't cohesive.
I love sports. Basketball, tennis, mostly soccer. Parties are the best when I'm around because I'm so spontaneous and vociferous that everyone is entertained. I don't get embarrassed easily, in fact, I embrace it. Expensive things are stupid to me. Give me something cheap or free and I will appreciate it more than anything as long as it came from the heart. Nature is the best thing in the world! Being surrounded by trees, the breeze, the sound of water. It's all so peaceful and beautiful.
However, I don't get to any of these things I enjoy so much. Sports are too dangerous, "I don't want you to get hurt," he says. Cute, but I can handle it, just let me try. No.
Party? I love to party! No. Too risky. Too many people are doing what I don't like. So? Just because they're doing something I don't agree with doesn't mean I'm going to give them a lecture. I'll let them be and do my own thing, I don't mind. I entertain myself and that's that.
Let's go walk around. Let's go to the park. Let's bike ride! Let's do something outside! No. "I'm too tired," "It's too hot." Really?
I'm a huge Disney fan! I love movies! Theater performances! Museums! I've lived in California my whole life and not once have I been to the Santa Monica Pier! Take me! No, no, no!
And yet, I cannot keep away. I am attracted to my opposite and I can't seem to let go. When he kisses me on the head. Holds my hand gently. Takes my face in his hands and tells my he loves me and never wants anything to happen to me. When we cuddle together and it's not at all sexual. When he fixes my hair. Writes me cards. Buys me gifts. These actions win me over and I can't help it. I'm definitely attracted.
Yes, I would like that I can do everything I like again. Hear him say yes for once.
This may sound dumb to you or maybe you agree with me, but as personal as this is, and I know my boyfriend wont like it, but today I wasn't expecting to call my boyfriend and hear him tell me that a girl friend is picking him up and taking him to her house. Thanks for the heads up. What does he expect me to say? "Oh joy! I'm so glad this girl friend of yours is picking you up and taking you with her to her house where I have no clue where it's located! Enjoy..." Really?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but what part of any of this sounds like everything is okay? Oh, it's because she drives that it's okay, well that just makes everything much better! If he was so concerned about driving he would have busted his ass to try and get his license. Yet, he is not.
However, his small smiles, his eyes, his laugh all just win me over. His fingers rubbing my arm. His small, random kisses on my cheek. Immature? Maybe, but he has a right to be. It's just that I'm considered too mature for my age. Screws us both over, but, "opposites attract."
I'll admit, I'm very jealous. I wasn't always, but when I realized what a catch my boyfriend really was, I got protective. Maybe even a little obsessed. "Clingy." That may be true, but at least I show that I care. Give me a chance, I will prove that I can be the best girlfriend in the world.
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
Loss
This year has definitely been filled with loss. Two lives lost within 2 months, yet each were accepted differently the way the lives were lost differently. First it was someone I didn't really know. The second, someone I did know. The first loss was made into a big deal. The second, hardly anyone knows. To me, there shouldn't be such a huge difference. In the end, two lives were taken, and two families lost a child. Why should the attention given to them be different?
I understand that the first life took some time, she was in a coma for a few days and that gave everyone hope. There were several prayer sessions, candles were lit, and posters were made. There wasn't a day that went by where you didn't see a post including RIP. My news feed was flooded by posts and pictures. All this time brings me to notice, the family and the friends had time to cope with the idea that maybe she wasn't going to pull through. After the first sign, I was already prepared for the loss. Yes, everyone experiences sorrow differently, but at least everyone was given time.
The recent loss, I was informed, happened just this past Friday, February 1, 2013. A friend of mine, a senior, was riding his Moped, suddenly, he crashed into a truck... he died. During this time I was in the lock-in, I didn't find out until Saturday night. How sudden. One day I was wondering why I hadn't seen him in a while, the next day I find out he's dead. His parents didn't get the opportunity to prepare, and his friends sure as hell didn't.
Yet, I show up to school Monday morning and no one has a clue of what happened. Still, 2 days later, there is really no idea of the loss. Why? Because no one thought it should be as big of a deal as the first loss. I'm not saying that the last loss was meaningless, I'm saying that this loss should not go unnoticed if everyone made a HUGE deal about the last one. No parent deserves to lose a child, especially if those children were so close to graduating. No friend should feel the loss of another friend, especially if they were anxious to continue being their friend. I hardly knew this guy but I knew him better than the girl who died.
I want to make this death a big deal but I'm not ready, and I'm sure no one else is. However, I wish to say, please pray for his family as well as the other girl's. Thank you, and please value your life as well as others'.
I understand that the first life took some time, she was in a coma for a few days and that gave everyone hope. There were several prayer sessions, candles were lit, and posters were made. There wasn't a day that went by where you didn't see a post including RIP. My news feed was flooded by posts and pictures. All this time brings me to notice, the family and the friends had time to cope with the idea that maybe she wasn't going to pull through. After the first sign, I was already prepared for the loss. Yes, everyone experiences sorrow differently, but at least everyone was given time.
The recent loss, I was informed, happened just this past Friday, February 1, 2013. A friend of mine, a senior, was riding his Moped, suddenly, he crashed into a truck... he died. During this time I was in the lock-in, I didn't find out until Saturday night. How sudden. One day I was wondering why I hadn't seen him in a while, the next day I find out he's dead. His parents didn't get the opportunity to prepare, and his friends sure as hell didn't.
Yet, I show up to school Monday morning and no one has a clue of what happened. Still, 2 days later, there is really no idea of the loss. Why? Because no one thought it should be as big of a deal as the first loss. I'm not saying that the last loss was meaningless, I'm saying that this loss should not go unnoticed if everyone made a HUGE deal about the last one. No parent deserves to lose a child, especially if those children were so close to graduating. No friend should feel the loss of another friend, especially if they were anxious to continue being their friend. I hardly knew this guy but I knew him better than the girl who died.
I want to make this death a big deal but I'm not ready, and I'm sure no one else is. However, I wish to say, please pray for his family as well as the other girl's. Thank you, and please value your life as well as others'.
Geocaching
Hello my fellow readers! It's been a while since I've written because I've been extremely busy, but I'm writing now and I want to share my experience with Geocaching. Geocaching is basically a modern treasure hunt. First you download the app, either free or $10, then pick a place where you want to find the treasure. Pretty simple right? Sometimes, it all depends on the hints and how good you are at finding the treasure.
For the past 2 Sundays I have gone Geocaching with the youth ministry of my church. It's been a good experience because I got to spend with my friends, get exercise, and find hidden treasure. You don't always have to go on foot, most people like to go by car, but once we went walking because it was nearby.
Not only is Geocaching about finding treasure, it's also a team effort. One person navigates and reads the hints. It's up to the team to figure out where the Geocach is hidden. Trust me, it's gets frustrating trying to figure out the hints, but usually it's worth it.
However, sometimes you can't find team work. For instance, this past Sunday my team and I went on 2 Geocaches. The first one took us a while because the hints were confusing but we found it eventually! The second Geocach is a bit of a different story.The team ended up splitting up. Most of the girls stayed behind while the boys ventured up into the underbrush. We waited 20 minutes before calling them to check up on their progress. They hadn't found it.
Another 10 minutes and we called again. They still hadn't found it. We were sure the Geocach was much closer to where we were, but we didn't have the hints to know for sure and the boys refused to come back down. As much as we wanted to find the Geocach, it would be lost forever because their was a huge lack of team work. Maybe if we had stuck together we could have found the Geocach. It's a lesson well learned and hopefully we don't do it again.
The victory of finding a Geocach is the best feeling ever, but the fact that I got to do with my friends made the experience even better. I suggest going Geocaching because you get to learn teamwork and enjoy yourself in the process! My challenge to you: Try Geocaching at least once with a group of enthusiastic friends and find some hidden treasure!
For the past 2 Sundays I have gone Geocaching with the youth ministry of my church. It's been a good experience because I got to spend with my friends, get exercise, and find hidden treasure. You don't always have to go on foot, most people like to go by car, but once we went walking because it was nearby.
Not only is Geocaching about finding treasure, it's also a team effort. One person navigates and reads the hints. It's up to the team to figure out where the Geocach is hidden. Trust me, it's gets frustrating trying to figure out the hints, but usually it's worth it.
However, sometimes you can't find team work. For instance, this past Sunday my team and I went on 2 Geocaches. The first one took us a while because the hints were confusing but we found it eventually! The second Geocach is a bit of a different story.The team ended up splitting up. Most of the girls stayed behind while the boys ventured up into the underbrush. We waited 20 minutes before calling them to check up on their progress. They hadn't found it.
Another 10 minutes and we called again. They still hadn't found it. We were sure the Geocach was much closer to where we were, but we didn't have the hints to know for sure and the boys refused to come back down. As much as we wanted to find the Geocach, it would be lost forever because their was a huge lack of team work. Maybe if we had stuck together we could have found the Geocach. It's a lesson well learned and hopefully we don't do it again.
The victory of finding a Geocach is the best feeling ever, but the fact that I got to do with my friends made the experience even better. I suggest going Geocaching because you get to learn teamwork and enjoy yourself in the process! My challenge to you: Try Geocaching at least once with a group of enthusiastic friends and find some hidden treasure!
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